Skip navigation

The social media zombie apocalypse

The zombie apocalypse is already upon us. Social media has turned many of us into drones. We've checked out of the real world to obsessively, compulsively, and often unwittingly check our various accounts. Have you seen one of these social media zombies walking among us?

Social media zombie infographic

Get the code

Click the button to get the embed code for your site.

View text

Click on the button to read a transcript of the infographic

THE SOCIAL MEDIA ZOMBIE APOCALYPSE

It’s scary, but it’s true: The zombie apocalypse is already upon us. Social media has turned many of us into drones. We’ve checked out of the real world to obsessively, compulsively, and often unwittingly check our various accounts. Have you seen one of these social media zombies walking among us?

FACEBOOK


The Baby-Obsessed Zombie
This zombie can’t stop compulsively posting statuses about their child.
Telltale Signs:
Terrifying ultrasound profile photos
Barrage of requests to vote for their baby in creepy infant photo contests
Constant references to child’s sidekick Sophie the Giraffe
Feeds On: The lifeblood of their childless, unmarried friends.

The Check-In Zombie
The easiest zombie to elude, this one always lets you know where they’re at.
Telltale Signs:
Checks in at “Zombieland”
Checks in at “The Most Comfortable Bed in the World”
Checks in at “Right Behind You”
Feeds On: Tagging friends who refuse to check in to places.

TWITTER


The Hashtag Zombie
You may not ever understand this zombie, but that’s not the point.
Telltale Signs:
#speaksonlyinhashtags
#compulsively #puts #a #pound #sign #on #everything
#makesuperidiculouslylonghashtagsthatareimpossibletoread
Feeds On: Complete sentences #nomnom.

The Inner Dialogue Zombie
This one can’t help but express every single thought that enters their brain.
Telltale Signs:
“I’m hungry.”
“Where is everyone?”
“Did my face always look like this?”
Feeds On: The minutia of everyday life.

INSTAGRAM


The Foodie Zombie
These zombies run in packs and linger around hip food trucks and new gastropubs.
Telltale Signs:
Mindlessly document every meal and beverage
Sits silently in restaurants, entranced by their smartphone
Not satisfied by a meal until it’s liked by at least 5 followers
Feeds On: Double-digit likes on their brunch pics.

The Foot Photo Fetish Zombie
These zombies compulsively set up the perfect vista shot to show you where their feet have been.
Telltale Signs:
Frequent falls and runs into things due to constant downward gaze
Fancy footwear ready for a photo op
Never far from a hammock, ottoman, or chaise set up for a shot
Feeds On: Groupons for cheap pedicures.

PINTEREST


The Zombie Bride
This zombie can’t stop pinning over-the-top favor ideas, save-the-date designs, and color palettes.
Telltale Signs:
Covered in chalkboard paint
Armed with a hot glue gun and broken mason jars
Shrieks when they spot a new hair tutorial
Feeds On: Cake tasters and the mediocre nuptials of couples who married before Pinterest.

The Mini-Me Zombie
This zombie compulsively seeks out and pins anything miniaturized.
Telltale Signs:
Never seen out without mini muffin pans
Tries to shrink everything in sight
Followed around by a mini horse and miniature Poodle
Feeds On: Mini quiches, bite-size caprese salads, and gazpacho shots.